YOUR MOST VALUED STRENGTH
From Steve Goodier’s NEWEST BOOK: A LIFE THAT MAKES A DIFFERENCE
I recently learned of a research organization that asked several thousand people, “What are the most serious faults of executives in dealing with their associates and subordinates?” Several could be chosen. What do you think was mentioned most often? Here is the list:
1. 15% Bias and letting emotions rule
2. 15% Indecision
3. 21% Miscellaneous, which includes lack of courtesy, loss of temper, sarcasm, jealousy, nervousness, etc.
4. 17% Failure to delegate authority
5. 17% Arrogance
6. 17% Arbitrariness
7. 19% Lack of frankness and sincerity
8. 24% Lack of leadership
9. 34% Failure to size up employees correctly
10. 36% Failure to show appreciation or give credit
11. 68% Failure to see the other person’s point of view
The fault cited most often, as the survey shows, was failure to see the other person’s point of view. It was mentioned nearly twice as often as the next most common problem.
Yet on a more positive side, the strength most valued in the workplace is the ability to understand another. And I suspect that strength rates high in all relationships. We don’t always need others in our life to agree with us, but we do need to feel heard and understood. In fact, feeling understood may well be one of our greatest emotional needs. Without it, we can feel disheartened, we believe we don’t matter, and we find ourselves increasingly unhappy and lonely.
Grade school children demonstrate this important human need to be heard. One writer tells about a group of children who seldom talked about personal problems with their teachers or the school principal for fear of the consequences. But…in which adult were the children confiding most often? The school custodian! Here was a person who would listen without judging. Here was someone safe, someone who would understand.
Author Og Mandino gives us this challenge: “Beginning today, treat everyone you meet as if they were going to be dead by midnight. Extend
to them all the care, kindness, and understanding you can muster, and do it with no thought of any reward. Your life will never be the same again.”
It’s a universal principle: when we habitually decide to be understanding, we soon feel more understood. And our lives are never the same again.
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